April Fools' Day/2009 transcription

Overview

The transcript[1] of the April Fool's Screenshots was provided by Positron on April 2, 2008 on the official forums.[2]

Part 1

Welcome to City of Heroes(R), Horatio. You last played on 4/1/87.

You find yourself standing in Atlas Plaza, the statue of Atlas towers above you. There is a plaque at the base of the statue, and Miss Liberty stands on a platform to the north of the statue. To the south is Paragon City Hall. To the North is Atlas Drive. To the East is Emmert Street. To the West is Dakan Ave. Also here are Capt. Liberty, Ms. B. Haven, and The Luckster.

>Go North

You are on Atlas Drive. A small park sits to the North. To the East is Emmert Street. To the West is Dakan Ave. To the South is Atlas Plaza. There are two Police Officers here. Also here is Mr. Awesome Guy. Mr. Awesome Guy yells “Someone changed my name!” Mr. Awesome Guy smiles at you. Mr. Awesome Guy whispers to you, “Want to team up against some Thugs?”

>Whisper no

You whisper to Mr. Awesome Guy, “no”

>Go North

You find yourself in a park with a small lake in the middle of it. The park looks a tad run down and unkempt. To the South is Atlas Drive. To the North is a lake. There is a Thug here.

>Ataack Thug

I don’t know what you are trying to do. The Thug shoots you with his pistol. (Rolls a 93) The Thug hits you! You lose 5 Hit Points. You have 45 of 50 Hit Points remaining.

>Attack Thug

I don’t know what you are attacking the Thug with. The Thug shoots you with his pistol. (Rolls a 70) The Thug hits you! You lose 5 Hit Points. You have 40 of 50 Hit Points remaining.

>ATTACK THUG WITH ENERGY BLASST

I don’t know what you are attacking the Thug with. The Thug shoots you with his pistol. (Rolls a 100) The Thug critically hits you! You lose 15 Hit Points. You have 25 of 50 Hit Points remaining. You are BLEEDING. You lose 1 Hit Point. You have 24 of 50 Hit Points remaining.

>ATTACK THUG WITH ENERGY BLAST

You blast a bolt of blue energy at the Thug! (Rolls a 24) You miss! The Thug shoots you with his pistol. (Rolls a 56) The Thug hits you! You lose 5 Hit Points. You have 19 of 50 Hit Points remaining. You are BLEEDING. You lose 1 Hit Point. You have 18 of 50 Hit Points remaining.

>Go South

You are on Atlas Drive. A small park sits to the North. To the East is Emmert Street. To the West is Dakan Ave. To the South is Atlas Plaza. There are two Police Officers here. Also here is Mr. Awesome Guy. A Thug appears from the North. The Thug shoots you with his pistol. (Rolls a 84) The Thug hits you! You lose 5 Hit Points. You have 13 of 50 Hit Points remaining. The Policeman shoots the Thug. (Rolls a 12) The Policeman shoots the Thug. (Rolls a 65) The Policeman hits the Thug. The Policeman hits the Thug. The Thug takes 1000 points of damage. The Thug takes 1000 points of damage. The Thug is defeated! (+0 experience points because the enemy was defeated by an NPC.) You are BLEEDING. You lose 1 Hit Point. You have 12 of 50 Hit Points remaining. Mr. Awesome Guy laughs at you! Mr. Awesome Guy whispers, “should have teamed up!”

Part 2

>Bandage

Who are you trying to Bandage? You are BLEEDING. You lose 1 Hit Point. You have 11 of 50 Hit Points remaining.

>Bandage Self

I don’t see Self anywhere around. You are BLEEDING. You lose 1 Hit Point. You have 10 of 50 Hit Points remaining. The BLEEDING WORSENS!

>Bandage myself

I don’t see myself anywhere around. You are BLEEDING profusely. You lose 5 Hit Points. You have 5 of 50 Hit Points remaining.

>Bandage me

You attempt to bandage yourself. You don’t have any bandages! You are BLEEDING profusely. You lose 5 Hit Points. You have 0 of 50 Hit Points remaining. You have been defeated! You can go to the Hospital or wait for someone to revive you. Mr. Awesome Guy is rolling on the floor, laughing.

>go hospital

An ambulance arrives at your location, you fall unconscious. You awaken in the hospital in Atlas Park. Doctors have tended to your wounds and got you back on your feet. There is a closet and a door in this room.

>Open closet

You open the closet

>Look closet

You see Horatio’s Power Armor, Horatio’s Energy Blast Gauntlet, Horatio’s Rocket Boots, and Horatio’s Targeting Array.

>Get all in closet.

You get Horatio’s Power Armor. You get Horatio’s Energy Blast Gauntlet. You get Horatio’s Rocket Boots. You get Horatio’s Targeting Array.

>Equip Armor

You put on Horatio’s Power Armor.

>Equip Gauntlet

You put on Horatio’s Energy Blast Gauntlet.

>Equip Boots

You put on Horatio’s Rocket Boots.

>Equip Targeting Array

You don’t have a Targeting.

>Equip Array

You can’t equip Array.

>Activate Array

I don’t know what you are trying to do.

>TURN ARRAY ON

You activate Horatio’s Targeting Array.

Part 3

>Go Door

You make your way through the hospital, to the exit. You sign yourself out. You are on Bleaker Street. To the east is Renwald Avenue. To the west is Emmert Street. The City Hospital is here. An Information Terminal is here. Dr. Morena is standing on the corner. He looks like he has a mission for you. Also here is Capt. Faceplant and Almostbulletproof.

>Look Terminal

You see a sign on the terminal that reads “coming soon!”

>Talk to Dr. Morena

Dr. Morena tells you, “Thanks for coming to see me, Horatio. The clinic across the street has been dealing with more and more thugs breaking in and stealing the drugs there. Can you do me a favor and check and see if any thugs are over there right now, and arrest them if you need to?” (Type Accept to accept the mission)

>Accept

I don’t know what you are trying to accept.

>Accept Mission

There is no mission to accept.

>Talk to Dr. Morena

Dr. Morena tells you, “Thanks for coming to see me, Horatio. The clinic across the street has been dealing with more and more thugs breaking in and stealing the drugs there. Can you do me a favor and check and see if any thugs are over there right now, and arrest them if you need to?” (Type Accept to accept the mission)

>Accept Mission

You accept the mission. You are on Bleaker Street. To the east is Renwald Avenue. To the west is Emmert Street. Across the street is the Clinic. The City Hospital is here. An Information Terminal is here. Dr. Morena is standing on the corner.

>Go Clinic

You are inside the Atlas Clinic. There are three Thugs here, stealing drugs. They don’t immediately acknowledge you.

>Attack thug with energy blast

You blast a bolt of blue energy at the Thug! (Rolls a 100) You Critically Hit! You deal 50 points of damage to the Thug. You have defeated the Thug (+10 experience points) The Thug drops a Pistol, a Holster, a Wallet, and a Drugs. The Thug shoots you with his pistol. (Rolls a 12) The Thug misses you! The Thug shoots you with his pistol. (Rolls a 22) The Thug misses you!

>Attack thug with energy blast

You blast a bolt of blue energy at the Thug! (Rolls a 56) You hit! You deal 25 points of damage to the Thug. You have defeated the Thug (+10 experience points) The Thug drops a Pistol, a Holster, a Wallet, and a Drugs. The Thug shoots you with his pistol. (Rolls a 29) The Thug misses you!

>Attack thug with energy blast

You blast a bolt of blue energy at the Thug! (Rolls a 77) You hit! You deal 25 points of damage to the Thug. You have defeated the Thug (+10 experience points) The Thug drops a Pistol, a Holster, a Wallet, and a Drugs.

Part 4

>Look

You are inside the Atlas Clinic. On the ground is a Pistol, a Pistol, a Pistol, a Holster, a Holster, a Holster, a Wallet, a Wallet, a Wallet, a Drugs, a Drugs, and a Drugs.

>Get Holster

Which Holster are you trying to get?

>Get first Holster

You pick up a Holster.

>Equip Holster

You equip the Holster.

>Get first pistol

You pick up a pistol.

>Put pistol in holster

You put the pistol into the holster on the floor.

>PUT PISTOL IN MY HOLSTER

You don’t have a pistol.

>GET PISTOL

Which pistol are you trying to get?

>GET FIRST PISTOL

You pick up a pistol.

>PUT PISTOL IN MY HOLSTER

You put the pistol into your holster.

>QUIT

Thank you for playing City of Heroes(R), Horatio.